The cold night make you calm down. It was one night in September. The nearest time for me to death. But it is also the time where I have found the hope.

In the autumn the weather is always rainy and windy. I was a high school boy who have just lost the first love. My family is poor. Mother opened up one small store along the street in our house. And I have a classmate who live around and he is not nice. I feel shame for my poor family. It is a sad truth. There are a lot of young kids just like me. They are not confident because their family is poor. But the classmate live around ask many of the classmates to come to see the store. One of them is the one I like. People say the young kid do not know what is the love. But I believe it is the purest love. They laugh at my family because of the small store. I feel shame but there is nothing I can change. It is the truth. Then I run to my bedroom and cry. The mother do not understand me. In the night, she still yell at me. I am sensitive in the teenage. I feel it is the shame. In the September night I run up to the top floor of the building next to my family house. The top floor is one flat roof covered with the black painting. I and my friends have get here when we are the kids. Now they all have moved away from this place because of the bad environment. But our family still live here. I stand at the edge of the roof. There is one second I think I can jump down and finish all the suffering. But I failed. I do not have the courage. Then I ly on the roof of the house. The rain stopped and the stars show up at the dark blue sky. It was very beautiful. I ask the god why I am suffering in my life. Why can't I live a better life? There is no one answer me. But since then I have made up my mind to change the life. 

After I get back the family house, my mother ask me where I have gone.I do not answer. She never know I have thought that much at the roof right next to her store.

The silent night make people think. The brain is one universe. The memory is the stars. There are the shinning stars and the dark stars. They make up this universe. It is beautiful. 

I used to be one naive man who believe that passion can change one's mind. Love is one thing you can not control. It is like the magic between two people. And you can not make people love you. You just can attract other people. But I do not know understand why there is no one love me. I do not know the feeling of being loved. It is a shame and also sad. 

Do you believe in fate? This question have been asked a thousand times. Yes or no, it is one hard choice. People work hard to change their life. Someone have turned their own stories into the legend. But what we have done during this age?There are more and more people better than us. So how can we believe we can change the fate. Maybe the god or one system have arranged their life. But they are not caring us. The fate make us have someone love. Or the fate would make myself be alone forever. 

Here is my situation. I work fior myself. It is a running good enough to raise one company but it is better than working for others. But I have to work alone. There is no people I know here. I have to work all day long. I even do not have a partner. All these things make me have to be alone. So will I give up the work here to start a new life at the place where I know more people. Or should I just stay here to earn more money? This is one question. I am still single at the age 27. There is no love here. And the job here is the only thing I care. But how can I make a choice?